I'm pro-abortion. People suck, there's too many of them, and it's easier to kill them before they're born. --Bill Hicks

Twice they've tried to con me today. Twice! Stupid fucking wankers. I was so pissed after the first one (the standard "this voucher was already used when I bought it, give me my money back") , and then the other one came with the dumbest fucking con ever.

It went like this: two people, a man and a woman came into the shop, the man took a thirty-pence packet of chewing gum and gave me a twenty pound note. When I started counting the change, the woman found a fifty-pence in her pocket and offered it to me. So I gave the man back his note, gave the woman a twenty-pence change, we thanked each other, and they started to leave. Suddenly the guy turns back and asks me to give him his twenty pound note back.

Now, I admit that it is possible that I might have a brain tumor or some shit like that, but it's rather unlikely so if I remember giving the bastard his fucking twenty pound note back, that means I did give it back. And if I should trust his memory more than my own, I'm much deeper in shit than I would have imagined.

Accidently I've found out that porn calms me down pretty quickly. Strongly recommend that.